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HomeGross jokes

Gross jokes

Andy: What’s worse than having a worm in your apple?
Tom: No idea.
Andy: Having half a worm in your apple.

Joke by Bradley C., Carlisle, Pennsylvania
0 comments

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Patrick: Why was the nose sad?
Peter: Beats me.
Patrick: Because it didn’t get picked!

Joke by Patrick L., Audubon, Pa.
6 comments

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Nicholas: Why did the fish blush?
Tommy: I haven’t a clue.
Nicholas: Because it saw the ocean’s bottom!

Joke by Nicholas P., Fort Myers, Fla.
13 comments

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A book never written: “All That’s Left of Me” by Myra Maines.

Joke by Kieran F., Emporia, Kan.
5 comments

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James: What do you find in a well-cleaned nose?
Carl: Search me.
James: Fingerprints!

Joke by Carl L., Sumter, S.C.
7 comments

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Matt: What does the king do when he burps?
Bob: I give up. What?
Matt: He issues a royal pardon!

Joke by Matthew K., Vienna, Va.
4 comments

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Gus: What happened when the skinny butcher backed into his grinder?
Spike: Beats me.
Gus: He got a little behind in his work!

Joke by Will B., Madison, Wis.
1 comments

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Today's Top-Rated Jokes

  • 1 vote, average: 5.00 out of 51 vote, average: 5.00 out of 51 vote, average: 5.00 out of 51 vote, average: 5.00 out of 51 vote, average: 5.00 out of 5 Acorn parades are nuts
  • 1 vote, average: 5.00 out of 51 vote, average: 5.00 out of 51 vote, average: 5.00 out of 51 vote, average: 5.00 out of 51 vote, average: 5.00 out of 5 Superman’s favorite place to...
  • 1 vote, average: 5.00 out of 51 vote, average: 5.00 out of 51 vote, average: 5.00 out of 51 vote, average: 5.00 out of 51 vote, average: 5.00 out of 5 Knock, knock. Who’s there? A...
  • 1 vote, average: 4.00 out of 51 vote, average: 4.00 out of 51 vote, average: 4.00 out of 51 vote, average: 4.00 out of 51 vote, average: 4.00 out of 5 A dinosaur that explodes
  • 1 vote, average: 4.00 out of 51 vote, average: 4.00 out of 51 vote, average: 4.00 out of 51 vote, average: 4.00 out of 51 vote, average: 4.00 out of 5 Never take this bird to a bank

All-Time Top-Rated Jokes

  • 27 votes, average: 4.63 out of 527 votes, average: 4.63 out of 527 votes, average: 4.63 out of 527 votes, average: 4.63 out of 527 votes, average: 4.63 out of 5 Actually, it’s Brian
  • 36 votes, average: 4.58 out of 536 votes, average: 4.58 out of 536 votes, average: 4.58 out of 536 votes, average: 4.58 out of 536 votes, average: 4.58 out of 5 No canned food
  • 26 votes, average: 4.58 out of 526 votes, average: 4.58 out of 526 votes, average: 4.58 out of 526 votes, average: 4.58 out of 526 votes, average: 4.58 out of 5 Injury needs heat or ice?
  • 30 votes, average: 4.57 out of 530 votes, average: 4.57 out of 530 votes, average: 4.57 out of 530 votes, average: 4.57 out of 530 votes, average: 4.57 out of 5 Knock, knock. Who’s there? C...
  • 25 votes, average: 4.56 out of 525 votes, average: 4.56 out of 525 votes, average: 4.56 out of 525 votes, average: 4.56 out of 525 votes, average: 4.56 out of 5 Cool disguise, Tom

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