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Jokes

More than 3,000 funny jokes and clean jokes submitted by kids. All jokes are clean, funny and appropriate for children. Check out the Joke of the Day and the 100 most-popular jokes.

Justin: Knock, knock.
Cory: Who’s there?
Justin:
Cargo.
Cory:
Cargo, who?
Justin:
Cargo in the garage.

Joke by Justin K., Rockville, Maryland
0 comments

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LIAM: Have you heard the joke about yoga?
KYLE: No. What is it?
LIAM: Never mind; it’s a bit of a stretch.

Joke by Liam K., Charlotte, North Carolina
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Zayn: Knock, knock.
Willy:
Who’s there?
Zayn: Alpaca.
Willy:
Alpaca, who?
Zayn:
Alpaca the suitcase. You load up the car.

Joke by Zayn A., Winnetka, Illinois
0 comments

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EDWARD: Why did the baker need to work so hard?
MICHAEL: I’m stumped.
EDWARD: Because he had to make some dough.

Joke by Edward B., Rawlings, Maryland
0 comments

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CAMILLE: How do mountains see?
SEAN: How?
CAMILLE: They peak.

Joke by Camille D., Wake Forest, North Carolina
0 comments

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DRAKE: What do you call a Scout who can fly?
RICK: What?
DRAKE: An Eagle Scout.

Joke by Drake L., Charlotte, North Carolina
0 comments

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JAKE: What kind of machine never lies?
NIC: No clue.
JAKE: A fax machine.

Joke by Jake L. , Westford, Massachusetts
0 comments

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NATHAN: Where do horses live?
JASON: I don’t know. Where?
NATHAN: In a neigh-borhood.

Joke by Nathan M., Joliet, Illinois
0 comments

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Riya: Knock, knock.
Bridget:
Who’s there?
Riya: Oh, hi.
Bridget: Oh, hi,who?
Riya: No! It’s Ohio.

Joke by Riya T., Exeter, New Hampshire
0 comments

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LEIF: Knock, knock.
PERRIN: Who’s there?
LEIF: Repeat.
PERRIN:Repeat, who?
LEIF: Who, who, who.”

Joke by Leif S., Jasper, Indiana
0 comments

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BEN: Why did the turkey cross the road twice?
DAWN: I don’t know.
BEN: To prove it’s not a chicken.

Joke by Ben H., Clifton Park, New York
0 comments

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TOM SWIFTY: “This knife needs sharpening,” Tom said dully.

Joke by Luke S., Bristol, Tennessee
0 comments

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Josh: What did the lettuce say to the celery?
Gina: Tell me.
Josh: “Quit stalking me!”

Joke by Josh A., Wake Forest, North Carolina
0 comments

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JAMES: What do you call a greedy pig?
ROGER: What?
JAMES: A hog.

Joke by James H., Buffalo, New York
0 comments

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Jeangib: Why don’t bears wear hiking boots?
Tom: I don’t know.
Jeangib: Because they prefer to go barefoot.

Joke by Jeangib G., Rush Center, Kansas
0 comments

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RYAN: Where do sheep go on vacation?
FRANK: No clue.
RYAN: The Baaahamas.

Joke by Ryan P., Tampa, Florida
0 comments

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JESSICA: What do you get when two giraffes collide?
JAMES: What?
JESSICA: A giraffic jam.

Joke by Jessica J. , Chanhassen, Minnesota
0 comments

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BRANDON: Why was the candle-trimming shop closed Monday through Friday?
SAMMY: I’m not sure.
BRANDON: Because the staff only works on wick ends.

 

Joke by Brandon G., Bremerton, Washington
0 comments

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ELI: What kind of instrument does a pickle play?
ALEX: What?
ELI: A piccolo.

Joke by Elijah W., Pulaski, New York
0 comments

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Ethan: I have a bed, but I don’t sleep.
I have a bank but no money.
I have a mouth but can’t talk.
What am I?
Alice: No idea.
Ethan: A river!

Joke by Ethan M., North Potomac, Maryland 
0 comments

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JUSTIN: What fruit do twins love?
HOPPER: I’m stumped.
JUSTIN: Pears! 

Joke by Justin G., Merritt Island, Florida
1 comments

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JACK: What do you call an Eagle Scout off to military boot camp?
JARED: What?
JACK: A bald eagle.

Joke by Jack I., Redmond, Washington
1 comments

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MIRACLE: Why are plants afraid of math?
MELODY: I’m not sure.
MIRACLE: Because plants don’t like square roots.

Joke by Miracle A., Kingsnorth, U.K.
1 comments

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Lillian: Why is the cheetah so bad at hide-and-seek?
Jo: Why?
Lillian: Because it’s always spotted.

Joke by Lillian R., Pleasant Gap, Pennsylvania
0 comments

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GABE: What do you call a cow on an elevator?
RAMSEY: I’m not sure.
GABE: Raising the steaks.

Joke by Gabe M., Cameron, North Carolina
0 comments

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Heard any good jokes lately? Scout Life will send you this Official Contributor patch for each joke of yours we publish in the printed magazine.

Today's Top-Rated Jokes

  • 1 vote, average: 5.00 out of 51 vote, average: 5.00 out of 51 vote, average: 5.00 out of 51 vote, average: 5.00 out of 51 vote, average: 5.00 out of 5 The chess playing dog
  • 1 vote, average: 5.00 out of 51 vote, average: 5.00 out of 51 vote, average: 5.00 out of 51 vote, average: 5.00 out of 51 vote, average: 5.00 out of 5 A man with penguins in his tru...
  • 1 vote, average: 5.00 out of 51 vote, average: 5.00 out of 51 vote, average: 5.00 out of 51 vote, average: 5.00 out of 51 vote, average: 5.00 out of 5 The kangaroo’s complaint
  • 1 vote, average: 5.00 out of 51 vote, average: 5.00 out of 51 vote, average: 5.00 out of 51 vote, average: 5.00 out of 51 vote, average: 5.00 out of 5 I wish I were rich
  • 1 vote, average: 5.00 out of 51 vote, average: 5.00 out of 51 vote, average: 5.00 out of 51 vote, average: 5.00 out of 51 vote, average: 5.00 out of 5 A man in a library

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