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HomeTime jokes

Time jokes

TWO SCOUTS CAMPING in their backyard wanted to know the time, so they started singing at the top of their lungs. Then one of their neighbors threw open his window and yelled, “Cut the noise! Don’t you know it’s 3 o’clock in the morning?”

Joke by Michael B., Varysburg, New York
1 comments

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JACKSON: Will you remember me in 10 seconds?
ADA: Yes.
JACKSON: Will you remember me in 10 minutes?
ADA: Yes.
JACKSON: Will you remember me in 10 days?
ADA: Yes.
JACKSON: Knock, knock.
ADA: Who’s there?
JACKSON: I thought you said you’d remember me! 

Joke by Jackson B., Ellicott City,Maryland
1 comments

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Comic by Van Scott
2 comments

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ELLA: How can you tell if a Scout has earned their Cooking merit badge?
CHELSEA: How?
ELLA: They’ll make good use of their thyme.

Joke by Ella R. , Lynnwood, Washington
0 comments

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NATHANIEL: How long did George Washington play in the football game?
REX: How long?
NATHANIEL: One quarter.

Joke by Nathaniel C., Manhattan, Kansas
0 comments

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STEPHEN: What did the clock say when it ran out of batteries?
LACEY: I’m not sure.
STEPHEN: “I guess I’m out of time.”

Joke by Stephen B., Silver Spring, Maryland
0 comments

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Comic by Jon Carter
0 comments

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STEVEN: Have you ever tried to eat a clock?
JAMES: No.
STEVEN: It’s very time-consuming.

Joke by Aiden M., Logan, Utah
0 comments

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Cole: What time is it when your clock strikes 13?
Patrick: I haven’t the foggiest.
Cole: It’s time to get a new clock.

Joke by Cole W., Center Moriches, New York
2 comments

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DAVID: What time did the patient see the dentist?
SAM: Tell me.
DAVID: Tooth-hurty!

Joke by David T., Elmhurst, Illinois
3 comments

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GABRIEL: What time is it when you see six chickens?
JENN: I don’t know.
GABRIEL: Six o’cluck.

Joke by Gabriel G., Oakton, Virginia
2 comments

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GABRIEL: What time is it when you see six chickens?
JENN: I don’t know.
GABRIEL: Six o’cluck.

Joke by Gabriel G., Oakton, Virginia
2 comments

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Andrew: What does a clock do when it’s hungry?
Pedro: Tell me.
Andrew: It goes back four seconds.

Joke by Andrew S., South Ogden, Utah
0 comments

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Chris: What do you call a belt with a watch on it?
Theo: Tell me.
Chris: A waist of time.

Joke by Chris M., Wichita, Kansas
6 comments

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Tom Swiftie: “I always arrive a few minutes late,” Tom said fashionably.

 

Joke by Thomas F., New Providence, New Jersey
0 comments

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Bob: I ate my watch yesterday!
Link: How was it?
Bob: It was really time consuming.

Joke by Gavin C., Westfield, Indiana
1 comments

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Caleb: Did you hear about the hungry clock?
Jim: No. What happened?
Caleb: It went back four seconds.

Joke by Caleb R., Gig Harbor, Washington
0 comments

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Chris: Knock, knock.
Kevin: Who’s there?
Chris: Ben.
Kevin: Ben, who?
Chris: Ben standing here for an hour!

Joke by Christopher Z., Hopewell Junction, N.Y.
1 comments

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Larry: How do you know when a clock is hungry?
Ben: Tell me.
Larry: When it goes back for seconds.

Joke by Ikenna A., Charleston, S.C.
9 comments

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A book never written: “Unbelievable Rescues” by Justin Time.

Joke by Matthew H., Concord, Calif.
7 comments

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