Jokes by Scout Life
  • Browse 6,000+ Jokes
  • 100 Best Jokes
  • Jokes By Topics
  • Joke Types
    • All Jokes
    • Comics
    • Long Jokes
    • Knock, Knock Jokes
    • Tom Swiftie Jokes
    • A Book Never Written
    • Daffynition Jokes
    • Warped Wiseman Jokes
  • Submit Jokes
  • Subscribe
  • Scoutlife.org
HomeJokesTom Swiftie Jokes

Tom Swiftie Jokes

Tom Swiftie (or Tom Swifty) jokes always include a quoted sentence linked by a pun to the way it’s attributed. These jokes became popular in the 1960s and are based on the “Tom Swift” book series from the early 20th century.

Tom Swiftie: “This milk is good,” Tom uttered.

Joke by Aitan G., Palo Alto, Calif.
0 comments

Tom Swiftie: “I ate all seven lamb chops!”  Tom said sheepishly.

Joke by Landon H., Waco, Tex.
0 comments

Tom Swiftie: Tom chimed in, “Those bells are too loud!”

Joke by Conner V., Chico, Calif.
0 comments

Tom Swiftie: “I’m proud to be a Californian,” Tom stated.

Joke by Colin R., Twin Falls, Idaho
3 comments

Tom Swiftie: “Let’s put on a small play,” Tom said skittishly.



.

, Gaithersburg, Md
2 comments

Tom Swiftie: “I just learned how to play the organ!” Tom piped up.

Joke by David B., Richfield, Minn.
2 comments

Tom Swiftie: “That ghost movie was horrible!” Tom booed.

Joke by Zakir G., Los Angeles, Calif.
3 comments

Tom Swiftie: “Don’t drop that bottle of lye,” Tom said caustically.

Joke by Robert H., Noblesville, Ind.
2 comments

Tom Swiftie: “I have only diamonds, clubs and spades,” Tom said heartlessly.

Joke by Dan H., Conshohocken, Pa.
5 comments

Tom Swiftie: “Don’t light those fireworks!” Tom exploded.

Joke by Jeffrey D., Lansing, Mich.
5 comments

Tom Swiftie: “I’m not eating too much candy,” Tom said sweetly.

Joke by Kevin A., St. Louis, Mo.
1 comments

Tom Swiftie: "Ow! I cut myself!" Tom said sharply.

Joke by Nick B., Oak Park, Ill.
2 comments

Tom Swiftie: "You like to sew!" Tom needled his brother.

Joke by Wade C., Denton, Tex.
2 comments

Tom Swiftie: "Can I open a checking account?" Tom asked with interest.

Joke by Zach B., South Williamsport, Pa.
18 comments

Tom Swiftie: "I love meat and potatoes," Tom said heartily.

Joke by Benjamin M., Otis, Ore.
3 comments

Tom Swiftie: "You have the right to remain silent," Tom said arrestingly.

Joke by Michael H., Senatobia, Miss.
1 comments

Tom Swiftie: "A storm is coming!" Tom thundered.

Joke by Tommy W., Decatur, Ga.
1 comments

Tom Swiftie: "I heard a mouse!" Tom squeaked.

Joke by Amanda M., Springfield, Mo.
2 comments

Tom Swiftie: "You broke my rubber band!" Tom snapped.

Joke by Treyton M., Cove, Ore.
6 comments

Tom Swiftie: "Where's my food?" Tom stewed.

Joke by Tyler B., Suwanee, Ga.
0 comments

Tom Swiftie: "I got squished by a board," Tom said flatly.

Joke by Jacob W., Chesapeake, Va.
3 comments

Tom Swiftie: "I hate sewing," Tom fabricated.

Joke by Patrick N., Folsom, Calif.
2 comments

Tom Swiftie: "I didn't eat ALL the lamb chops," Tom said sheepishly.

Joke by Seth C., Denton, Tex.
1 comments

Tom Swiftie: "I like your bracelet," Tom said charmingly.

Joke by Tristan P., Yorba Linda, Calif.
2 comments

Tom Swiftie: "Let's go catch some fish!" Tom said alluringly.

Joke by David W., Shapleigh, Me.
1 comments

Posts pagination

« 1 … 9 10 11 »
ADVERTISEMENT

Send Us Your Jokes

patch for submittting a joke to Scout Life
Heard any good jokes lately? Scout Life will send you this Official Contributor patch for each joke of yours we publish in the printed magazine.

Today’s Top-Rated Jokes

  • Chicken coops only have two do...
  • How a fish gets from place to ...
  • “Storing Foods”
  • Stop dropping rolls

All-Time Top-Rated Jokes

  • Cool disguise, Tom
  • No canned food
  • Dark side has more shade
  • Who’s a good boy?
  • Dracula’s dentist

Make a Pocket Joke Book

Download and fold your own pocket-sized joke book.

Scout Life Comics

ADVERTISEMENT
Now on Scoutlife.org
  • Scoutlife.org
  • Games
  • Jokes
  • Outdoors & Gear
  • Hobbies & Projects
  • Scouts
  • Contests & Giveaways
  • Subscribe
Scout Life magazine
Scout Life magazine cover
Subscribe Today!
Follow Scout Life
  • Follow on Facebook
  • Follow on Twitter
  • Follow on Instagram
  • Follow on YouTube
  • Follow on Pinterest
Contact Scout Life
ONLINE: scoutlife.org/contact-us
PHONE: (866) 584-6589
MAIL: 1325 W. Walnut Hill Lane, P.O. Box 152401, Irving, TX 75015-2401
Join Scouting
Scouting America logo
Visit beascout.org to find out how you can get involved in Scouting.
  • Subscribe
  • Subscriber Services
  • Archives
  • Contact Us
  • Advertise
  • Join Scouting
  • Privacy Policy

© 2026, Boy Scouts of America. All rights reserved.