Jokes by Scout Life
  • Browse 5,100+ Jokes
  • 100 Best Jokes
  • Jokes By Topics
  • Joke Types
    • All Jokes
    • Comics
    • Long Jokes
    • Knock, Knock Jokes
    • Tom Swiftie Jokes
    • A Book Never Written
    • Daffynition Jokes
    • Warped Wiseman Jokes
  • Submit Jokes
  • Subscribe
  • Scoutlife.org
HomeDoctor jokes

Doctor jokes

Ayn: Hey, Max! Why are you staring at your hamburger?
Max: Because my doctor told me to watch what I eat.

Joke by Ayn A., Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
0 comments

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars
Loading...

Allison: Why did the Christmas tree go to the doctor?
Parker: I’m stumped!
Allison: Because it had tinselitis.

Joke by Allison E., Ballwin, Missouri
0 comments

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars
Loading...

Comic by Scott Masear
0 comments

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars
Loading...

Comic by Scott Nickel
0 comments

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars
Loading...

MICHAEL: Why did the pony go to the doctor?
LAURA: I don’t know. Why?
MICHAEL: Because it was a little horse.

Joke by Ben G., Davis, California
1 comments

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars
Loading...

Comic by Scott Nickel
0 comments

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars
Loading...

Comic by Scott Nickel
0 comments

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars
Loading...

Patient: Hey, Doc, I think I broke my leg in two places. What should I do?
Doctor: Don’t go to those places anymore!

Joke by Ruby M., Austin, Texas
3 comments

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars
Loading...

PHILLIP: Why did the beluga have to go to the doctor?
COLE: Tell me.
PHILLIP: It didn’t feel too whale.

Joke by Connor F., Woodstock, Georgia
0 comments

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars
Loading...

Comic by Harley Schwadron
0 comments

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars
Loading...

Comic by Harley Schwadron
1 comments

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars
Loading...

Comic by Pat Lewis
1 comments

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars
Loading...

Comic by Scott Nickel
3 comments

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars
Loading...

Comic by Scott Nickel
0 comments

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars
Loading...

Dillan: Why did the banana go to the doctor?
Ben: Why?
Dillan: It wasn’t peeling well.

Joke by Dillan E., Olathe, Kansas
4 comments

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars
Loading...

Erik: Why did the pony go to the doctor?
Leroy: Beats me.
Erik: It was a little horse.

Joke by Logan W., Fairfield, CaliforniaP
0 comments

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars
Loading...

John: What do you call a supernatural doctor?
Marcus: What?
John: A para-medic.

Joke by John C., The Dalles, Oregon
0 comments

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars
Loading...

Comic by Scott Nickel
1 comments

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars
Loading...

Erik: Why did the pony go to the doctor?
Leroy: Beats me.
Erik: It was a little horse.

Joke by Logan W., Fairfield, California
1 comments

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars
Loading...

Patient: Doctor, doctor! I think I might be a deck of cards.
Doctor: Go sit in the waiting room. I’ll deal with you later.

Joke by Anish S., Cumming, Georgia
0 comments

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars
Loading...

Comic by Scott Nickel
0 comments

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars
Loading...

Comic by Scott Nickel
0 comments

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars
Loading...

Comic by Jon Carter
3 comments

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars
Loading...

A man takes his sick Chihuahua to the veterinarian. They’re immediately taken back to a room.

Soon, a Labrador walks in, sniffs the Chihuahua for 10 minutes and leaves. Then a cat comes in, stares at the Chihuahua for 10 minutes and leaves. Finally, the doctor
comes in, prescribes some medicine and hands the man a $250 bill.

“This must be a mistake,” the man says. “I’ve been here only 20 minutes!”

“No mistake,” the doctor says. “It’s $100 for the lab test, $100 for the cat scan and $50 for the medicine.”

Joke by Daniel H., Caledonia, Michigan
11 comments

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars
Loading...

Comic by Scott Nickel
2 comments

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars
Loading...

Posts navigation

1 2 »
ADVERTISEMENT

Send Us Your Jokes

Heard any good jokes lately? Scout Life will send you this patch for each joke of yours we publish in the printed magazine. If your joke is a Pedro’s Pick, you’ll receive $10.

Today's Top-Rated Jokes

  • 1 vote, average: 5.00 out of 51 vote, average: 5.00 out of 51 vote, average: 5.00 out of 51 vote, average: 5.00 out of 51 vote, average: 5.00 out of 5 Fleas on summer vacation
  • 1 vote, average: 5.00 out of 51 vote, average: 5.00 out of 51 vote, average: 5.00 out of 51 vote, average: 5.00 out of 51 vote, average: 5.00 out of 5 A well-cleaned nose
  • 1 vote, average: 5.00 out of 51 vote, average: 5.00 out of 51 vote, average: 5.00 out of 51 vote, average: 5.00 out of 51 vote, average: 5.00 out of 5 Noah fishing on the ark.
  • 1 vote, average: 5.00 out of 51 vote, average: 5.00 out of 51 vote, average: 5.00 out of 51 vote, average: 5.00 out of 51 vote, average: 5.00 out of 5 “These pigs sure do like thi...
  • 1 vote, average: 5.00 out of 51 vote, average: 5.00 out of 51 vote, average: 5.00 out of 51 vote, average: 5.00 out of 51 vote, average: 5.00 out of 5 How the man found the chiropra...

All-Time Top-Rated Jokes

  • 20 votes, average: 4.85 out of 520 votes, average: 4.85 out of 520 votes, average: 4.85 out of 520 votes, average: 4.85 out of 520 votes, average: 4.85 out of 5 The Dark Knight rises
  • 20 votes, average: 4.80 out of 520 votes, average: 4.80 out of 520 votes, average: 4.80 out of 520 votes, average: 4.80 out of 520 votes, average: 4.80 out of 5 A raccoon’s photo roll
  • 39 votes, average: 4.72 out of 539 votes, average: 4.72 out of 539 votes, average: 4.72 out of 539 votes, average: 4.72 out of 539 votes, average: 4.72 out of 5 Knock, knock. Who’s there? W...
  • 23 votes, average: 4.65 out of 523 votes, average: 4.65 out of 523 votes, average: 4.65 out of 523 votes, average: 4.65 out of 523 votes, average: 4.65 out of 5 Why did you park here?
  • 21 votes, average: 4.62 out of 521 votes, average: 4.62 out of 521 votes, average: 4.62 out of 521 votes, average: 4.62 out of 521 votes, average: 4.62 out of 5 Dracula’s dentist

Make a Pocket Joke Book

Download and fold your own pocket-sized joke book.

Scout Life Comics

ADVERTISEMENT
Now on Scoutlife.org
  • Scoutlife.org
  • Games
  • Jokes
  • Outdoors & Gear
  • Hobbies & Projects
  • Scouts
  • Contests & Giveaways
  • Subscribe
Subscribe Today!
Follow Scout Life
  • Follow on Facebook
  • Follow on Twitter
  • Follow on Instagram
  • Follow on YouTube
  • Follow on Pinterest
Contact Scout Life
ONLINE: scoutlife.org/contact-us
PHONE: (866) 584-6589
MAIL: 1325 W. Walnut Hill Lane, P.O. Box 152401, Irving, TX 75015-2401
Join Scouting
Visit beascout.org to find out how you can get involved in Scouting.
  • Subscribe
  • Subscriber Services
  • Archives
  • Contact Us
  • Advertise
  • Join Scouting
  • Privacy Policy

© 2023, Boy Scouts of America. All rights reserved.