6,000 Funny Kids Jokes - Scout Life Think & Grin Jokes

Daffynition: Commentator – an average potato.

Joke by Alex S., Milwaukee, Wis.
2 comments

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Steve and Mark are camping when a bear suddenly comes out and growls. Steve starts putting on his tennis shoes.

Mark says, “What are you doing? You can’t outrun a bear!”

Steve says, “I don’t have to outrun the bear—I just have to outrun you!”

Joke by Kyle R., St. Louis, Mo.
18 comments

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Curt: Why do dragons sleep during the day?
Bert: Why?
Curt: Because they fight knights!

Joke by Curtis P., Onawa, Iowa
8 comments

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A book never written: “Finding Your Way” by Miss Guided.

Joke by Stephen C., Round Rock, Tex.
6 comments

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Kevin: What happened to the frog’s car when it parked in the handicapped spot?
Katy: What?
Kevin: It got toad!

Joke by Kevin L., East Norwich, N.Y.
7 comments

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Counselor: This is a dogwood tree.
Ben: How do you know?
Counselor: By its bark.

Joke by Michael K., Lanham, Md.
9 comments

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A book never written: “All About Light Fixtures” by Shanda Leir.

Joke by Kevin R., Van Buren, Ark.
1 comments

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Seth: What do you call a dead pine tree?
Beth: What?
Seth: A never-green!

Joke by Seth B., Cameron Park, Calif.
7 comments

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A book never written: “Stay as Long as You Like” by Lee V. Mediately.

Joke by Adam P., Princeton, N.J.
2 comments

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James: What stories do the ship captain’s children like to hear?
Neal: What?
James: Ferry tales!

Joke by Aubrey T., Jackson, Miss.
1 comments

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Tom Swiftie: “You have the right to remain silent,” Tom said arrestingly.

Joke by Michael H., Senatobia, Miss.
1 comments

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A book never written: “I Hate Pasta!” by Mack A. Roney.

Joke by Brian B., Prinsburg, Minn.
0 comments

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Elijah: What did the man do when he got a big gas bill?
Jonah: What did he do?
Elijah: He exploded!

Joke by Elijah B., Gilbert, Ariz.
0 comments

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A book never written: “Campfire Safety” by Ben Burnt.

Joke by Emily P., Old Lyme, Conn.
2 comments

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Son: For $20, I’ll be good.
Dad: Oh, yeah? When I was your age, I was good for nothing.

Joke by Robby S., Putnam Valley, N.Y.
22 comments

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Fred: Why did the dachshund go under the shady tree?
Ned: Why?
Fred: Because he was a hot dog!

Joke by Jonathan B., Clanton, Ala.
7 comments

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A book never written: “Types of Flowers” by Al R. Gies.

Joke by Shaun T., Glenolden, Pa.
1 comments

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Manager: Our new infielder cost $10 million. I call him our “Wonder Player.”
Fan: Why’s that?
Manager: Every time he plays, I wonder why I bothered to get him.

Joke by Josh S., Pittsford, N.Y.
11 comments

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Matt: What did the pan say to the stove?
Thomas: What?
Matt: You’re looking hot tonight.

Joke by Matthew C., Branson, Mo.
1 comments

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Warped Wiseman says: “Once I got angry with an Italian chef, so I gave him a pizza my mind.”

Joke by Brien V., Lewis Center, Ohio
6 comments

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A book never written: “How to Keep Awake” by Ty Erdguy, illustrated by Anita Knapp.

Joke by John S., Hopedale, Mass.
5 comments

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Frank: If everybody was a type of car, what type of car would a 4-foot-6-inch basketball player be?
Josh: I don’t know. What type?
Frank: A Mini Hooper.

Joke by Parker B., Indianapolis, Ind.
9 comments

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A book never written: “The History of the Red Sox” by Yan Key.

Joke by Jacob H., York, Pa.
2 comments

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When the reporter asked how he could be smart enough to rob the museum but dumb enough to still get caught, he said: “I didn’t have the Monet to buy Degas to make the Van Gogh.”

Joke by Allan M., Storrs, Conn.
9 comments

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Austin: What did one dinosaur say to the other when the volcano blew?
Boston: What?
Austin: “What a lava-ly day we’re having!”

Joke by Austin R., Forreston, Ill.
0 comments

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