6,000 Funny Kids Jokes - Scout Life Think & Grin Jokes

A vacuum cleaner salesman told a farmers wife, “Ma’am, if this doesn’t pick up every speck of dirt in your house, I’ll eat what’s left.”

The lady handed him a spoon and said, “O.K. We don’t have electricity.”

Joke by Ted G., Kansas City, Mo.
35 comments

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A book never written: “Unsinkable Boats” by Ty Tanic.

Joke by Benjamin E., Silver Spring, Md.
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Sister: Mom wants your to help us fix dinner.

Brother: Why? Is it broken?

Joke by Stephanie R., Chittenango, N.Y.
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Dee: Why did the caretaker put a fence around the cemetery?

Lee: Why?

Dee: People were dying to get in.

Joke by Dan D., Oakland, N.J.
40 comments

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A book never written: “Quilting Without Instructions” by Pat Urn.

Joke by Nicholas G., Wilmington, Ohio
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Dan: Why does Cinderella never win at sports?

Stan: Why?

Dan: She has a pumpkin for a coach and runs away from the ball.

Joke by Danny C., Ponte Vedra Beach, Fla.
19 comments

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Joe: What kind of music do rabbits like?

Mo: What?

Joe: Hip hop.

Joke by Allen N., Salinas, Calif
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A book never written: “Bulls With an Attitude” by Ben Hitt.

Joke by David O., Houston, Tex.
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Rob:What was Camelot famous for?

Bob:What?

Rob: Its knight life.

Joke by Rehan M., Houston, Tex.
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Teacher: Johnny, please use the word “gruesome” in a sentence.

Johnny: Yessir. “The man stopped shaving and gruesome whiskers.”

Joke by Mike D., Woodbury, Minn.
13 comments

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A man was walking through the woods when a bear started to chase him.

Soon the man tired of running, fell to his knees and prayed, “Lord, please don’t let this bear eat me.”

The man noticed the bear was also praying: “Lord, thank you for this meal I am about to receive.”

Joke by Eric L., Rocky Point, N.C.
30 comments

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A Cub Scout found a frog that said, “Kiss me and I will become a beautiful princess.” The boy studied the frog, then put it in his pocket. “Hey,” the frog croaked, “how come you didn’t kiss me?” “I’d rather have a talking frog than a princess any day!”

Joke by Brad S., San Antonio, Tex.
25 comments

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Peter: How did the dog get rid of his ticks?

Paul: How?

Peter: By taking off his watch.

Joke by Cody R., St. Regis, Mont.
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David: What do you get when you cross a chicken with a hyena?

Darrin: Dunno.

David: A critter that laughs at every yolk.

Joke by Darrin J., Chesterfield, Mich.
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Ted: Did anyone laugh when you fell on the ice?

Jed: No, but the ice made some cracks.

Joke by Ted G., Kansas City, Mo.
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Rob: Why did Goofy put a clock under his desk?

Bob: Why?

Rob: He wanted to work over time.

Joke by Andrew P., Howell, N.J.
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A book never written: “Full of Ideas” by Drew A. Blank.

Joke by Jake W., Woodland Hills, Calif.
6 comments

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A bald eagle goes into a barber shop for a haircut. “Sorry, I can’t give you a haircut,” the barber says. “Why not?” the bald eagle squawked. “You have feathers.”

Joke by Kyle K., Waimanalo, Hawaii
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Kerry: What does a dog do that a man steps into?

Mary: What?

Kerry: Pants.

Joke by David G., El Cajon, Calif.
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Ed: What do you get when you cross a cat and a lemon?

Ned: What?

Ed: A sourpuss.

Joke by Eric L., Rocky Point, N.C.
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Luke: What doesn’t ask questions but always demands an answer?

Laura: What?

Luke: A doorbell.

Joke by Brian C., Chester,Va.
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Gilligan: How do pigs talk to each other?

Skipper: How?

Gilligan: In swine language.

Joke by Derek T., Monticello, Ill.
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Casey: What did one volcano say to the other volcano?

Lacey: What?

Casey: “I lava you.”

Joke by Kenny L., Sylmar, Calif.
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Justin: What do you call a boomerang that doesn’t come back?

Dustin: What?

Justin: A stick.

Joke by Ethan P., Nokomis, Fla.
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Matt: What did the cloud give to the cashier?

Dat: What?

Matt: A rain check.

Joke by Matthew K., Waukesha, Wis.
3 comments

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