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More than 3,000 funny jokes and clean jokes submitted by kids. All jokes are clean, funny and appropriate for children. Check out the Joke of the Day and the 100 most-popular jokes.

Asher: Why did the bridge ask for a pen and paper?

Jamie: Why?

Asher: Because it was a drawbridge!

Joke by Asher W., Hartford, Wis.
0 comments

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Bob: What can be driven but has no wheels and can be sliced but stays whole?

John: I have no clue.

Bob: A golf ball.

Joke by Christopher J., Coatsville, Pa.
1 comments

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A book never written: "How to Make an Honest Living" by Robin Steele.

Joke by Molly K., Ringgold, Ga.
0 comments

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Tim: What would you get if you crossed a vampire and a teacher?

Tom: What?

Tim: Lots of blood tests!

Joke by Tim T., Whitehall, N.Y.
1 comments

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A photographer goes to a haunted castle determined to get a picture of a ghost. The ghost he encounters turns out to be friendly and poses for a snapshot. The happy photographer dashes to his studio, develops the film and…learns that the photos are underexposed and completely blank.

Moral to the story: The spirit is willing, but the flash is weak.

Joke by Jacob S., Lebanon, Ore.
1 comments

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Robert: Knock, knock.

Jack: Who's there?

Robert: Beets.

Jack: Beets, who?

Robert: Beets me!

Joke by Robert F., Cheyenne, Wyo.
7 comments

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Preston: What is round and has a really bad temper?

Louis: What?

Preston: A vicious circle!

Joke by Preston G., Shaftsbury, Vt.
0 comments

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Mea: What kind of lights did Noah put on the ark?

Millie: What?

Mea: Floodlights.

Joke by Daniel H., Port Hueneme, Calif.
2 comments

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A book never written: "My Life in Outer Space" by I. Malone.

Joke by Bryan S., Suffield, Conn.
2 comments

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Nathanael: Knock, knock.

Cindy: Who's there?

Nathanael: Distressing.

Cindy: Distressing, who?

Nathanael: Distressing has too much vinegar!

Joke by Nathanael C., Schaumburg, Ill.
4 comments

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A book never written: "How to Learn Your States" by Mrs. Sippy.

Joke by Riley H., Lubbock, Tex.
2 comments

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Warped Wiseman wonders: Why is mail that goes by sea called "CARgo" and mail that goes by land called "SHIPment"?

Joke by Glenn G., Union City, Calif.
107 comments

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A book never written:  "How to Defend a Fort" by Sir Render.

Joke by Nick B., Fergus Falls, Minn.
71 comments

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Kevin: What did the red wire say when the white wire asked it to come out and play?

Chris: I don't know. What?

Kevin: "I can't. I'm grounded."

Joke by Jesse H., Suffolk, Va.
2 comments

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Dear Dad,

$chool i$ great. I'm making lot$ of friend$ and $tudying hard. I $imply can't think of anything I need, $o ju$t $end me a card, a$ I would love to hear from you. Love, Your $on

Dear Son,

I kNOw astroNOmy, ecoNOmics and oceaNOgraphy are eNOugh to keep even an hoNOr student busy. Do NOt forget that the pursuit of kNOwledge is a NOble task, and you can never study eNOugh. Love, Dad

Joke by Jacob P., Orem, Utah
476 comments

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Sam: Knock, knock!

Grant: Who's there?

Sam: Little old lady.

Grant: Little old lady, who?

Sam: Wow! I didn't know you could yodel.

Joke by Sam P., Orem, Utah
21 comments

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Kevin: Have you heard the joke about the roof?

Aaron: No. What is it?

Kevin: Never mind — it's over your head.

Joke by Kevin V., Goleta, Calif.
4 comments

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Daffynition: Going against the grain -- Being on a no-carb diet.

Joke by Brian S., Charlotte, N.C.
4 comments

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Karen: What do you get when you cross a Mustang and an elephant?

Dan: What?

Karen: A convertible with a big trunk!

Joke by Karen D., Miami, Fla.
2 comments

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A book never written: "The Scout Symbol" by Flora D. Lee.

Joke by Christian L., Manchester, Tenn.
3 comments

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Tom Swiftie: "Didn't you see the train?" Tom steamed.

Joke by Isaac S., Nevada, Iowa
1 comments

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Al: Isn't this beastly weather we're having?

Hal: What do you mean?

Al: It's raining cats and dogs!

Joke by Amanda M., Springfield, Mo.
1 comments

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A book never written: "A Joke Book" by R. U. Sirius.

Joke by Bilbo S., Albuquerque, N.M.
9 comments

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Teacher: Why are you wearing so much makeup today?

Jade: I thought you said we were having a makeup test!

Joke by Brandon R., Terrytown, La.
2 comments

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Mom: What did you do at school today?

Mark: We did a guessing game.

Mom: But I thought you were having a math exam.

Mark: That's right!

Joke by Adam P., Wichita, Kan.
6 comments

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Heard any good jokes lately? Scout Life will send you this patch for each joke of yours we publish in the printed magazine. If your joke is a Pedro’s Pick, you’ll receive $10.

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