6,000 Funny Kids Jokes - Scout Life Think & Grin Jokes

General: Why hasn't this rocket been shot into space yet?

Scientist: The crew is on launch break.

Joke by John M., Beaumont, Tex.
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A book never written: "Helping the Environment" by Paul Lute.

Joke by David M., Milford, Mich.
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Ross: Why was Pedro spreading peanut butter on the road?

Blake: Why?

Ross: To go with the traffic jam!

Joke by Ross R., Coppell, Tex.
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Warped Wiseman wonders: "Why is a doctor's job called a 'practice'?"

Joke by Kevin F., Honeoye Falls, N.Y.
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Bob: What did the chessmaster say when he wanted his friend to look at something?
Nob: What?
Bob: "CHECK this out, MATE."

Joke by Wilhelm B., Clarksville, Tenn.
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Joe: Why did the patient laugh after his operation?

Moe: I don't know. Why?

Joe: Because the doctor had him in stitches.

Joke by Stephen C., Salem, Va.
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Tom Swiftie: "Let's go catch some fish!" Tom said alluringly.

Joke by David W., Shapleigh, Me.
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Patient: Doctor, I'm shrinking! You have to do something about it quickly!

Doctor: Take it easy. You'll just have to be a little patient.

Joke by Michael J., West Simsbury, Conn.
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Zach: What do mountain climbers like to read?

Jack: What?

Zach: Cliffhangers.

Joke by Zachary M., Amarillo, Tex.
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Ryan: Why did the boy stare at the automobile's radio?

Bryan: I don't know.

Ryan: He wanted to watch a car tune.

Joke by Ryan H., St. George, Utah
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Sam: What do you get when you cross an alien and a car?

Roger: What?

Sam: An ET cruiser!

Joke by Samual Y., Norfolk, Va.
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Larry: What do you get when you cross a computer with mozzarella?

Harry: Beats me. What?

Larry: Mac and cheese.

Joke by James B., Minneapolis, Minn.
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Patient: Doctor, doctor, I think I've turned into a pack of cards!

Doctor: I'll deal with you later.

Joke by Neil C., Schulenburg, Tex.
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A book never written: "How to Swing a Lightsaber" by Jed Eye.

Joke by Keegan B., Marathon, Wis.
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A book never written: "Finding Out Who You Really Are" by John Doe.

Joke by Nate P.
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Luke: Why is a snake so hard to fool?

Angela: Why?

Luke: Because it has no legs to pull!

Joke by Glenn G., Westford, Mass.
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Tom Swiftie: "The rope broke!" Tom snapped.

Joke by Kevin C., Crouse, N.C.
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Pedro: Did you know that Davy Crockett had three ears?

Bob: No.

Pedro: A right ear, a left ear and a wild frontier.

Joke by Adam G., Webster, N.Y.
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A book never written: "Really Good Musicals" by L. O. Dolly.

Joke by Luci B., Shoreview, Minn.
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Chris: Great news! The teacher said we have a test today, come rain or shine.

Darlene: What's so great about that?

Chris: It's snowing!

Joke by Chris K., Redlands, Calif.
70 comments

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Math teacher: Why don't amoebas produce great mathematicians?

Biology teacher: I haven't a clue.

Math teacher: Because they have to divide to multiply.

Joke by Alex R., Racine, Wis.
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A book never written: "Taking Care of Your Teeth" by Dr. Dee Kay.

Joke by Nathan Y., Covington, Va.
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A woman was taking a nap on Valentine's Day afternoon. After she awoke, she told her husband, "I just dreamed that you gave me a gorgeous and expensive diamond necklace for Valentine's Day! What do you think it means?"

"You'll know tonight," he said.

That evening, her husband came home with a small package for her. Thrilled, she opened it and found a book titled "The Meaning of Dreams."

Joke by Michael J., West Simsbury, Conn.
59 comments

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Mike: What happened when all the mail was discovered in a hole in the ground?

Elijah: What?

Mike: They blamed Pedro the Mail BURROW!