Laugh at funny Food jokes and comics for kids

Howard: What do you call a disgruntled frankfurter maker?
Suzan: Beats me.
Howard: Someone who doesn’t “relish” his job!

Joke by Howard W., Spring Hill, Fla.
3 comments

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A book never written: “Perfect Peanuts” by Ella Fant.

Joke by Muji R., Lafayette, Calif.
6 comments

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Jay: What do you get when you cross an alien and something white and fluffy?
Joe: What?
Jay: A martian-mallow!

Joke by Jayson T., Fremont, Calif.
2 comments

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A book never written: “To Be Grown in Idaho” by Ima Tater.

Joke by Brian C., San Bernardino, Calif.
8 comments

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A book never written: “Great Cheeses” by Cole B. Jack.

Joke by Patrick S., Lino Lakes, Minn.
3 comments

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Max: What do you call a kitten drinking lemonade?
Matt: I haven’t a clue.
Max: A “sourpuss.”

Joke by Max J., Norcross, Ga.
9 comments

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Daffynition: Doughnut—Someone crazy about money.

Joke by Miles K., Denton, Tex.
11 comments

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A book never written: “How to Make Cookies Taste Better” by Duncan Milk.

Joke by Frank M., Vineland, N.J.
6 comments

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A book never written: “The Vegetable Mafia” by Artie Choke.

Joke by Isaac B., Utica, N.Y.
3 comments

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Jake: Why did the orange go blind?
Justin: Beats me.
Jake: He didn’t have enough vitaminsee!

Joke by Jake S., Phoenixville, Pa.
2 comments

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Tom Swiftie: “I’ll cook the pancakes this morning,” Tom said flippantly.

Joke by Bill M., New Ulm, Tex.
4 comments

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Daffynition: Sugar cane—An edible walking stick.

Joke by Zack R., Middleton, Wis.
1 comments

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Kelvin: Why did the apple cross the road?
Martin: Why?
Kelvin: To get to Granny Smith’s house!

Joke by Kelvin D., Burke, Va.
12 comments

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Patrick: What do you call a Scottish dish that fades from the public eye?
Pedro: I haven’t the foggiest.
Patrick: A “haggis-been.”

Joke by Patrick H., Herscher, Ill.
3 comments

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Dylan: What’s God’s favorite cheese?
Robert: Beats me.
Dylan: Swiss, because it’s holey!

Joke by Dylan J., Los Gatos, Calif.
5 comments

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Warped Wiseman wonders: “Can you get American cheese in other countries?”

Joke by Daniel L., Bloomfield, N.J.
5 comments

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Jerry: Knock, knock.
Graham: Who’s there?
Jerry: Figs.
Graham: Figs, who?
Jerry: Figs the doorbell—it’s broken!

Joke by Shmuel N., Clinton, N.J.
2 comments

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Pedro: What do you get when you cross a racecar with a spud?
Ordep: Beats me.
Pedro: Crashed potatoes.

Joke by Braeden B., Rancho Palos Verdes, Calif.
5 comments

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Simon: Why did the orange go to the hospital?
Ted: I haven’t a clue.
Simon: Because it wasn’t peeling well.

Joke by Simon X., Riyadh, Saudi Arabia
4 comments

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Colt: What’s a bucket’s favorite food?
Mike: Beats me.
Colt: Pour-age.

Joke by Colton M., Rosenberg, Tex.
3 comments

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John: Knock, knock.
Caleb: Who’s there?
John: Gorilla.
Caleb: Gorilla, who?
John: Gorilla me a hamburger, please. I’m hungry!

Joke by Caleb F., Columbia, Tenn.
5 comments

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Larry: How do you know when a clock is hungry?
Ben: Tell me.
Larry: When it goes back for seconds.

Joke by Ikenna A., Charleston, S.C.
9 comments

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George: Knock, knock.
Simon: Who’s there?
George: Aida.
Simon: Aida, who?
George: Aida lot of sweets, and now I’ve got a tummy ache.

Joke by Aditya B., Naperville, Ill.
6 comments

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Rob: What do you call a potato that makes fun of you?
Pat: Beats me.
Rob: A “tater-taunt.”

Joke by Robert O., Elkton, Md.
3 comments

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Teacher: How do you find a square root?
Doug: That’s easy—just look for a square vegetable.

Joke by Marcel M., Orange, Calif.
8 comments

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