Jokes

Laugh at 6,000+ hilarious jokes and comics submitted by kids! Featuring clean and funny humor perfect for all ages. Don’t miss out on our Joke of the Day and explore the top 100 most popular jokes.

A police officer stops a car going 75 when the speed limit is 65. The officer asks the man driving if he realizes he was speeding.

The man replies, "Look right there -- that sign says the speed limit is 75."

The officer explains that that's the highway number, not the speed limit. As he says this, he looks in the back of the car and sees an elderly woman breathing very heavily.

The officer asks her if she's O.K., and she says, "Yes, we just got off of Highway 155."

Joke by Samuel E., Coweta, Okla.
195 comments

John visited his 90-year-old grandpa who lived way out in the country. On the first morning of the visit, John's grandpa prepared a breakfast of bacon and eggs. John noticed a film-like substance on his plate, and asked, "Are these plates clean?"

His grandpa replied, "They're as clean as cold water can get them. Just go ahead and finish your meal."

For lunch, Grandpa made hamburgers. Again, John was concerned about the plates, as his appeared to have specks of dried egg on it. "Are you sure these plates are clean?" he asked.

Without looking up, Grandpa said, "I told you before, those dishes are as clean as cold water can get them!" 

Later, as John was leaving, his grandpa's dog started to growl and wouldn't let him pass.

John said, "Grandpa, your dog won't let me get by!"

Grandpa yelled to the dog, "Cold Water, go lie down!"

Joke by Jonathan P., Chicago, Ill.
199 comments