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HomeAnimal jokes

Animal jokes

Get ready to roar with laughter! Our wild collection of animal jokes is packed with purr-fectly funny puns and one-liners about your favorite furry, feathered, and finned friends.

Steven: Where do wild animals go to work out?
Scott: I don’t know.
Steven: The jungle gym.

Joke by Steven A., Niceville, Fla.
1 comments

Julian: Knock, knock.
Brandon: Who’s there?
Julian: Moo.
Brandon: Moo, who?
Julian: Make up your mind: Are you a cow or an owl?

Joke by Julian R., Marietta, Ga.
11 comments

Daniel: What do you call it when a frog eats a firefly?
Pete: Tell me.
Daniel: A “light snack.”

Joke by Daniel P., Unalaska, Alaska
6 comments

Ashley: Which type of animal plays the guitar?
Brandon: Tell me.
Ashley: A strumming-bird.

Joke by Ashley R., Spokane Valley, Wash.
3 comments

Andrew: What kind of animal needs oil?
Pat: I haven’t a clue.
Andrew: A mouse, because it squeaks.

Joke by Andrew P., Greenville, Texas
6 comments

A book never written: “Large Animals” by L.F. Ant.

Joke by Tanner T., Sandy, Utah
5 comments

Shingi: Why did they quit testing animals at the zoo?
Mike: I haven’t the foggiest.
Shingi: There were too many cheetahs!

Joke by Shingirai K., Alpharetta, Ga.
8 comments

Ryen: What do you call a canine in winter?
Thomas: I haven’t a clue.
Ryen: “Chilidog.”

Joke by Ryen D., Kernersville, N.C.
3 comments

A book never written: “North American Birds” by Ray Venn.

Joke by Alexander D,, Minster, Ohio
2 comments

Joshua: Why did the rabbit go to the barbershop?

Al: I don’t know.

Joshua: He needed a hare cut!

Joke by Joshua A., Angola, N.Y.
8 comments

A book never written: “How to Fight Bulls” by Matt A. Door.

Joke by William S., Prairie Village, Kan.
1 comments

Bryan: What kind of shoes do mice wear?
Myrna: Tell me.
Bryan: Squeakers!

Joke by Bryan M., Waseca, Minn.
8 comments

Daffynition: Cunningham—A smart pig.

Joke by Olivia L., Matthews, N.C.
1 comments

Jack: Why do giraffes have long necks?
Jill: I have no clue.
Jack: Because their feet stink.

Joke by Alex S., Marietta, Ga.
6 comments

Johnathan: What do you call a high-ranking Scout with a buzz cut?
Bruce: Beats me.
Johnathan: A “bald Eagle.”

Joke by Johnathan B., North Richland Hills, Texas
16 comments

Ethan: What happened when the skunk wrote a book?
Stewart: I don’t know.
Ethan: It became a best-smeller!

Joke by Ethan Y., Pleasanton, Calif.
8 comments

Dawson: What do pigs give on Feb. 14?
Brad: I don’t know.
Dawson: Valen-swines!

Joke by Dawson M., Detroit, Mich.
8 comments

Zeke: Why did the lifeguard kick the elephants out of the swimming pool?
Kyle: I haven’t a clue.
Zeke: Because they couldn’t keep their trunks up!

Joke by Adam K., Wolcott, Conn.
3 comments

One day, a Cub Scout visited a farm. When he got home, he told his parents all about it. “I even saw a man who builds horses!” he said.

“Are you sure?” his mom asked.

“Yes,” the Cub Scout said, “he was just nailing on the feet when I got there.”

Joke by Daniel W, Bethany, Conn.
4 comments

Eric: Knock, knock.
Brett: Who’s there?
Eric: Owl.
Brett: Owl, who?
Eric: Owl tell you after I finish this Boys’ Life joke!

Joke by Eric H., Rio Rancho, N.M.
5 comments

Tim: What’s a truck full of bison?
Dan: I don’t know.
Tim: A buffa-load!

Joke by Charles D., Jackson, Tenn.
8 comments

Carl: Where does a turtle go when it’s raining?
Jimmy: Tell me.
Carl: A shell-ter!

Joke by Stephen T., Charlotte, N.C.
4 comments

Adam: What is your dog’s favorite breakfast?
Ben: I haven’t a clue.
Adam: Pooched eggs!

Joke by Adam P., Wayne, N.J.
2 comments

Alex: Where did our first president keep his mice?
Will: Tell me.
Alex: Mount Vermin!

Joke by Joshua R., Birmingham, Ala.
3 comments

A man was driving down the road when a policeman stopped him. The officer looked in the back of the man’s truck and said, “Why are these penguins in your truck?”

The man replied, “These are my penguins. They belong to me.”

“You need to take them to the zoo,” the policeman said.

The next day, the officer saw the same guy driving down the road. He pulled him over again. He saw the penguins were still in the truck, but they were wearing sunglasses this time. “I thought I told you to take these penguins to the zoo!” the officer said.

“I did,” the man replied. “And today I’m taking them to the beach."

Joke by Michael V., Tallahassee, Fla.
55 comments

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